Yesterday, the fam and I were hanging in Wal-Mart.
Yup - seriously - we were having a little Friday night family time - just meandering through Wal-Mart. If Jay wanted to look at camping gear and car gadgets ... he did. If I wanted to look at the new collection from Miley Cyrus ... I did. If Xander and Tobey wanted to check out all the toys in every single toy aisle ... they did. And we did.
I walked the boys to the bathroom while Jay was looking at who-knows-what in the automotive departement.
On our way back to Automotive, we ran into Books and Magazines. Tobey checked out some new chapter books for young people while Xander pushed in close to him and oohed and ahhhed over all the selections.
I turned my back to inspect the magazine selection. Tobey, completing his book perusal, turned to the magazines, too.
"Ugh! That is just WRONG!"
This is Tobey.
"Huh?" I ask.
"That is JUST WRONG."
He is clucking his tongue now, full of disapproval.
I look to where his eyes are resting. I see a motorcycle magazine with a gal in some sort of G-string bikini panty posing on the cover.
"Oh!" I gasp. "That IS just WRONG!"
I love Tobey's moral compass. When something is WRONG, he knows its WRONG - and he says so.
Below the woman with the rubber band flossing her backside, is an extremely, EXTREMELY pumped up male body builder. His muscles bulge grotesquely from his physique and his veins pop out between muscle and flesh.
This is me. I don't care for overly pumped up bodies. I find it vain and ... gross.
"Why is it 'ew', Mom?"
This is Tobey. Good question, Tobes. Why "ew" indeed?
After I tuck Tobey into bed, the question comes back to haunt me. I would never, ever, make a negative comment about the appearance of a seriously overweight person. And - when faced with a person severely malnourished, I would perhaps say that it makes me sad, but not "ew"! What gives me the right to judge one who has devoted time and energy to building up his body.
I am convicted. Looking down on someone for pouring time and energy into beefing up their body is no better than looking down on someone for pouring NO energy into caring for their bodies. In fact, putting myself in position to judge ANYONE on ANYTHING is, well ... just WRONG!!!
Shame on me.
I return to Tobey's room, and confess to him that I've reflected on what I said earlier about body builders being gross. I am ashamed for my comment - and even more ashamed that the comment was an overflow of my heart. Yucko. I tell him that I recognize that God has made us in ALL different shapes and sizes - and that for me to think I'm capable of discerning whether someone's body is lovely or not - is plain old ridiculous. Shame, shame, shame on me.
Tobey brightens up and encourages me very matter-of-factly, "Yes, mom. We're all different. We're supposed to be. It doesn't matter! God loves all of us!"
Ah yes, He does, honey. Yes, He does.